Myth busted that women want to have less sex.

Dear Bloggers,

We (me and my spouce) found out after many years that we are completely different and that she is thinking like a woman and I am thinking like a man.

I really start to think how it would be if we would be thinking the same way.
If it comes to the point we are the same, the only difference I can discover is that she is looking for somebody that needs to open up more to her world.
But why doesn't she guide me in the right direction?
I am an idiot if it comes to the romantic part, I must admit I was a lot better at it in my younger days.



I hope I will find my way back, otherwise I might loose the most beautiful thing in life, and of course I still love her with all my heart.
Unfortunate as I am, the men's part of my brain has taken over my female side of the body. (As a lot of men have to admit, I am afraid that we are thinking to much with our dick.)
But that is the problem if you have a women with a lovely body, could you stop thinking of anything else?



I found the follwing things by strawling through the web and foud the following issues, that I thought as a man to be worth mentioning.

Bachelors might have sex on their minds more than their single female counterparts, but once in a committed relationship, men and women have similar attitudes toward the act, a new study finds.

Past studies, the scientists pointed out, have shown that compared with women, men are more sexually permissive, endorse casual sex at higher rates and masturbate more often.
And even in dreamland, men are from Mars and women from Venus. A recent study showed men were more than twice as likely as women to report dreams about multiple sex partners.

Sexual feelings

While women placed more emphasis on the emotional aspects of sex, men focused more on the physical side of sex.
Men were much more likely to find sex personally and physically pleasurable, while women were more likely to think sex violates social taboos.
Thoughts often turn into actions. “Sexually restrictive gender roles too often become self-fulfilling prophecies because women know that they are expected to be less sexual than men, “and men know that they are expected to be more sexual than women.”



Men gave much higher ratings for risky sexual behaviors, such as “I should have sex with as many people as possible,” than women.
And women were more apt to endorse waiting longer and not engaging in premarital sex.



When Mr. Right shows up, however, women ditch society-imposed gender roles, warming up to sexual pleasures, the researchers found.
In the context of an intimate relationship, both genders expressed that sex was important as a way to bring couples closer, to help maintain healthy relationships and to increase one’s self confidence.

“People in romantic relationships give more importance to their own feelings and their partners’ than they do to social expectations about sexual behavior,”

Hmm... It is about time to change somethings in my head, maybe it is not too late yet.
But I really hate butterflies in my stomach.

The Old Sailor,

The contrasts in live.

Dear Bloggers,

It came to me, when I was at the local chinese restaurant to get some take away food for me and my family.
As I live in the country we are having quit firm types of women.



It is not that they are extremely big or fat, it is the whole picture that they not really fit in.
If you see the chinese people next to them, compared to them we are all big in length and a bit fatter if it comes to the model of the person.
And I must say they are all working hard together, but admit it looks a bit silly anyway. (for me it is just a great peace of humor, and there is not much to laugh about in this world at the moment.)
In todays cultural mix it is nothing strange anymore, if I just go back to my youth about thirty years ago.



I remember that I was kind of impressed when I saw the first dark skinned person, as we only knew them from illustrations in books and comics. (a lot of wrong impressions)



Now we are even see relationships between different cultures, and that is a good thing.
Only thing I do not understand is that some cultures are not adapting to the community were they live. It would give more peace if people had to do that as they have made the choice to leave their own country, to find a better live elsewhere.
Even people that had to escape their own country, because the regime would otherwise kill them.



The freedom of what we believe in or choice of religion is no problem at all, although we should not abuse the fact that we are different then the native community.
I will not say that the natives know best, but at least it could be studied by the religic leaders instead of kicking against the other religions. It is not a championship between the gods as the Greeks have believed for ages, after a while they figured out that this was not the right way.



We can do what we want and we can get a relationship with anyone we want.
If of course it is ethically accepted by the majority of the community.
I think every person has the right to make their own choices and mistakes and that it should be possible to learn from your mistakes as well. As every one has the free choice to believe in something that is fullfilling your personal wishes.

Old Sailor has also gone to space

Dear Bloggers,

From today my blog is also readable on Msn Space

Here is the address:http://oldsailor2007.spaces.live.com/

Of course I will keep producing on this blog

The Old Sailor,

Ilussions of love (in words)

Dear Bloggers,

Love is meaningless or....

Love is an Illusion

Just a while ago, I had observed that older couples are less loving towards each other compared to younger couples.
Naturally, I asked myself .. why so?
I could have settled for a simpler answer like - the feeling has faded or they no longer love each other or whatsoever.
However, I refused to take this for granted.



I remembered myself absurdly asking my female friends about this (to get some female perspectives) during our casual conversations.
But I wasn’t satisfied with the answers… and soon, I gave up.
It was only in recent years, I finally found the answer for this old little puzzle of mine.
I found all my answers on the web, nothing has to stay unknown if you know where to look for.(Google and Wikipedia are great tools.)



The ultimate purpose of human being is to breed and have children and continuing the next generation.
Everything in our life is geared towards that goal.
The survival of species is the ultimate quest in all living creatures.
It’s biological, it’s instinctive, it’s in our Will, something which is beyond our conscious control.
Not surprisingly, that these parts were rediscovered by the next generations again, such as the study of subconscious mind by Sigmund Freud and Evolution by Charles Darwin.

Although they produced their thoughts on paper years ago, they are based on the human being, the species was more important to them than any other matter.
Falling in love is a ‘blind biological urge’ in us - love is basically an illusion which pull men and women together.
Love in our mind is magical, sweet, sensational and is a symbol of happiness.
But little did we know that these emotions come together with Love as a whole ‘package’.
When human are able to get positive emotions out of something, we gain satisfaction.
The brain is giving a special treat if we are satisfied.
And this satisfaction is what keeps our desire alive.

It’s instinctive, and we are basically slaves to our own instinct and desire.
I believe that the truth is ugly.
Marriage is a trap to confine couples together.
Living as a husband and wife means halve both of their rights and double the duties. Having children will require the couples to put in more effort and resources to maintain the family.



It is not easy to satisfy your partner when there are children and she is scared that they might walk in.
Furthermore, one of the two is too tired to take the time to make really love to eachother, and to get a woman started that has known you for such a long time is not that easy.
As she knows all the things that you are not that good at, and she knows how to turn you down.
As a man you feel really hurt, and think that she does not like you anymore.
You are not able to seduce her with only a smile or a little joke.(men can be real insecure about their sexlive.)

She is not busy anymore with reproducing herself and is not worried that her husband will run away from her and their kids.
Maybe is this the key that so many couples are splitting up now a days.
As it is not easy to adjust your feelings all the time.



We got focussed on what was between us in past times, but the Love has changed into Liking you.
That is what we simply forget, eventhough you enjoy the softness of her skin, and the deepness of her kisses when she is aroused.
But making love is different, as reproduction is not the drive anymore.
And why men are parading with a young girl after they got divorced, as these girls bodies and minds are still being fully focussed on reproduction.
Men overall have much higher sexdrive and they regain their hunting skills if they are being turned down to often.
They start doubting themselves between there fourties and fifties.
The so called midlife crisis, were the time comes that the children have grown up and she is not paying enough attention to her partner. At this moment he will start reconsidering if he is not a good enough for her. All men will be a hunter forever it is just the comments of his surroundings or religic backgrounds that might hold him back from doing these things.(If you want to keep him happy, give him enough to live for.)



Therefore, only a force as strong as Love can ‘blind’ us, bringing men and women together under the same roof.
When we are finding our potential partners, we do not think of making babies with them, rather, we think of Love.
It seems that we have no choice but to fall in love and the illusion of love (which gives extreme positive emotions) will conveniently wipe away all the misery of a married life and having babies.

Buddha’s magic word - Emotions arise from Desire, hence an Illusion.

This perfectly answered the question I had and I think it is safe to conclude the reason why older couples are still together is due to respect and responsibility rather than still genuinely loving each other.
They simply got used to eachother with all the ups and downs in their relationship.

I always believe human are polygamous by nature.
But due to the development of human culture (of the different role between men and women), and more importantly the influence of religion such as Christianity, the nature rule has been replaced by human rule, championing the monogamous way.



Hmm...we simply can not afford an extra girlfriend in this expensive luxury lifestyle we are living, that is in at least 90% of the cases.
The ones that can, lead normally a double life as the wife should not find out.
(As poligamy is not accepted in our modern western culture.)
In certain cultures that are less developped than ours, polygamy is not that strange and having more wifes is accepted.
This is of course more natural, even I don't believe in the fact that women have to depend fully on a man.
If one of them complains about having a headache, you simply have a lot more options to have sex.



I whole heartily agree that biological drives are stronger then a reasoning on love. However, I am sure I will never follow his way of remaining single and living in solitude life till the end of my day.
I do want to have a life-long companion (wife) and a family.
This is my reasoning - if human are biologically a social animal and hardwired to fall in love, then why should we go against the nature? Biological is stronger than Reasoning, hence if we insist on following the literal Reasonings, wouldn’t it be a challenging difficulty for human to adapt to this deprived-of-instinct-fulfillment-life?
Wouldn’t it be a distress to live in a life where at one hand, we can’t take love seriously as we know it is just an illusion and on the other hand, we persistently being pestered by our biological instincts to fall in love.
We would be trapped in a no-man’s land.

That to me, is a miserable lose-lose situation.

I had a wicked thought while I was writing this blog.
I questioned, why do parents are willing to put their lives at stake in order to protect their children?

In many circumstances, the parent may even trade life to make sure the survival of their children.
It seems divine and noble in the first glance.
But it is not logical.

If the parents are willing to sacrifice themselves, despite saving their children, they lose their lives.
Not only that, they will have absolutely no control over the fate of their children once they are dead.
(if later on the children faced danger again and die, then the sacrifice of the parents will be futile.)

More logical would be:

If the parents are not willing to sacrifice themselves, their children will die but the parents are able to retain their lives. If they are healthy enough, they could breed again and replace the dead children with new children. They could oversee the growth of these new children and will able to drive their fate to a certain direction.

Many parents will choose the first option, much to the influence of our instinct.
I may sound a little sadist and not politically correct, but I am only treating this just as a daily thought-exercise, nothing more.

This gave me a little idea that human are not 100% rational and logical as we would like to believe in ourselves.
I have to admit that nothing in this world ruled by humans is rational, but this might change some peoples minds.

That we are all living in a bubble, I figured out that I write the best stories when I feel miserable and my relationship knows some troubles at the moment.

I know that it is a lot of wishfull thinking but Old Sailor’s magic words are:”Live life as long it is there, pray for less fights, spend your last money on a drink and fuck if your life is depending on it.”

The Old Sailor,

Computertrouble

Dear Bloggers,

My computer is troubling at the moment.
I am getting the funniest messages and errors



It is not that bad, but I have been losing my patience every now and then.




I had to ask for help



And get my computer serviced



And all my files were cleaned up.



They even got my Word program fixed.



As soon as I Can I will come with a blog again.

The Old Sailor,

Illusions Of Love

If you find out that love is an illusion, you don't need words. The music is enough.

The Old Sailor,

Unfaithful

Dear Bloggers,

Unfaithful is the word of the day.

(This is my greatest fantasy, the girl of all my erotic dreams)

“Well? Tell me! What would you do?”
(this discussion started when we talked about sexual hunting feelings, my opponent is everything I am not "Young, free an single")
These are my questions to my opponent.
The subject is committing adultery and more people are showing up to give their opinion.
The small talk about this subject turned all of sudden into the talk of the day.
“Would you tell it?” someone is asking.
With no doubt I say: "Yes, I would tell her."

I get up and walk away from the group.
“What the hell is going on” I wonder why this is so important to them, are they afraid that their own partner might do the same?



And is that not partly their own fault, women are strange in that way.
“What would you do?” someone all of a sudden asks.
“If you would see a friend of you kissing someone else?”
Straight forward as I am, I answer: “I will warn him about what this might do to his future.”
“And furthermore I find that he should tell his girlfriend otherwise I could not face them as a couple.”
“But what if she was the one?”



“Then I would talk with her, if this was a wise decission in her life?”
The remark is clear: “I never thought that you would be so much softer towards women”
I react: “The difference between man and woman are so huge.”
And my opinion is that men think as a hunter, with women it is more about feelings and it is much deeper.
I guess that the woman has already said goodbye to her relationship, before she goes into a new adventure, eventhough she still loves her man, but in a different way.
“He simply can not arouse her enough to give her the shivers when they have sex.”



“To me it is somehow kind of logical” Let’s have a smoke.
When we enter the smoking room still discussing this matter.
Other persons jump in and give their opinion.
“I woke up once in someones bedroom and I could not remember what happened” But the comment on a note on the table said it all. “Goodmorning beautiful, I love you.”
(No!, I am not going to tell you who said this, as it will undermine my integrity.)



Then someone else tells that her family goes first.
“Oh, I have been trying to mess up someones relationship.”
Says all of sudden someone, where I never expected that kind of things from.
My brain is runing on top speed and I am listening sharp, as this a great subject to place on my blog.


(something for the girls, otherwise I am called a sexist)

My conclusion is: “That we are all have gone through different experiences and all think in our own way.”
Some of us have enough and do not struggle with these kind of things, others have a fantasy and feel themselves comfortable with that.
And there are of course the ones that bring this fantasy to live.
And you know that they are having a relationship at home.
I am convinced that nobody is for a 100% satisfied in life, it explains a lot about us as human beings. But also that sex is important in someones life.

“Why are otherwise condoms and viagra are sold so much?”
A good investment at the moment a sex is a stabile factor even there is a financial crisis.
But tell me ..........honestly dear bloggers,
“What would you do if the friend of your best friend is unfaithful to her partner?
It gave me a lot food for thought, what about you?

The Old Sailor,

We should enjoy life

Dear Bloggers,

As usual I have quite a happy way to go through live.

It is only such a shame that I am thinking sometimes that I am the only one that can take nearly every situation as a realist.
If you being over 80 years old, than you should be able to think and accept that not all the things are so flexible as in your 20’s.
But yeah I am not a person that can stand melancholic people that think that the doctors can fix everything.
There is a time for everybody that you come to the end of your life journey. Everyone will end his life one day and whatever the cause might be.
If you are getting a bit older you have brought already a few family members or friends to "the fiddler's green".
I question myself sometimes: why have elderly people not adjusted themselves on the fact that a journey to the hospital by ambulance could be the last journey in life. Why is the human being so persistent to survive?
Over and over I am thinking "this could be the last one, if my wife calls that grandpa is in the hospital again."



But every time the surprising news is coming that he is getting better and can go back home again.
My question is: What is the quality of life?
The life is not always a rose garden en living happily ever after is also a fully milked out product.
I have known a time myself that I rather saw life going instead of facing another day filled with horrible thoughts and memories.
To me life is like a brutal child, which you love anyway.
I have never thought, that could ban these bad thoughts.
But I succeeded to get them far into the back of my head.
I do not have the illusion that I am going to be very old.
I am living life how it comes and day-by-day, I am not planning things very far ahead.
My way of thinking is: Who lives now has no need to complain later in life that he or she did not do anything because they saved for their pension.
When my time has come, a few persons will grief about you and probably miss you, but I am hoping one thing, that they will not grief forever.



You don’t have to be forgotten but with the years the memory is placing you in the background and of course the world did not stop turning and life is going on for all the other human beings.
They just carry on with the things they were.
Everybody can be replaced, although we think that we cannot be missed.

”Live life as long it is there, pray for less fights, spend your last money on a drink and fuck if your life is depending on it.”

The Old Sailor,

Parade of the bums

Dear Bloggers,

As I am only home for a short period, we had to go shopping on a Saturday.
And that is definetly not my favourite hobby, as you get pretty irritated by pensioners that have to pick up their social lives and block in the mean time with their shopping carts the alleyway.
Another thing with them is that can hold up the cue with counting out all their cents at the till.
Further there are mothers with children, which she can not handle on her own, as they are screaming and running through the shop.
And these are absolutely the spoiled kids, and I just wonder what is daddy doing at this moment?
Is he like me not home, or is he not willing to go with his family.
He was only the producer of the seed to make these little monsters, but she was the only one that wanted to have kids.
So that is why daddy is sleeping in, and she does not dare to fight him.
She still loves him, but something inside her is telling her that she is not fully happy with her live.
Ok, he is having a great income but he did not turn out, to be the romantic prince that he was when she just met him.



At that time she was young and had a lot of guys around her that tried to get her attention.
Or was it a pure sexual thing that these young blokes wanted.
Today she is there in the supermarket just in her thirties and she is joining all these other women, she is one of them, who is not getting any attention of her husband anymore.
They have a set live, they make love on Wednesday and Saturdaynights when the kids are sleeping and the soccergame is over.
Today she has done something very naughty.
She got out of her regular informal clothing, and dressed herself up as she was dressed when she was just eighteen.



Today she became a member of the parade of the bums.
She is wearing a short jackett and a thight pair of jeans, real eye candy, my mind is spinning another woman is playing with me.
I have to get myself down to earth again, for crying out loud what is happening to me.
And she is not the only one dressed like this, there are more women on the hunt.
The future is scaring me, more and more I get affraid of growing old.
Before I could hide myself as I fell for young girls, and tell myself you are to old for them.



But now I can’t hide as they are from my age, maybe my wife should do a better job to keep me away from all these tempting ladies.
I am thinking of sex all day, I am just like all the other guys and there is nothing wrong with a happy fantasy.
I feel like I am eighteen again and the hunters blood is crawling up in my body again.
The only difference is that we all have more live experience.
It never struck me before, but today it did.
Maybe I got as well a different look on women as before.
Still I am a man who is running around in the world watching other women, if I stop looking then there is something wrong.
I have to get hungry outside and eat at home.
But today was a good day as there was a lot of competition for the parade of the bums.

Bad luck for me that when we got home, I got horny, but she didn’t.
Another day without any kind of sex passed by, has my time come to only watch women, and have only sex on set days.
Is my wife starting to get old now or did she loose her interest in me?
This is really scaring me.

The Old Sailor,

It is autumn and gnomes have no place to live

Dear Bloggers,

Outside the weather is miserable and soon they are coming back from the coffee shops, were they hardly sell coffee but magic mushrooms are the thing to buy.
As the gnomes did not have any shelter problems during the summertime. It now all of a sudden gets dangerous on the paths of fairytale forest.



With brutal force the gnomes fight eachother to find a place to live.
My backyard looks like little Sarajevo, every day I have to collect the dead gnomes from my garden, as these pictures are not to nice for my youngest daughter.
It is not only in my backyard happening it is all over.



As it was beautiful weather later today, I jumped on my bike and toured a little bit with my kids.
When we stopped for a break and sat down on the bench, you could hear the machineguns rattling in the distance.



A battlefield in fairytale forest as the need for housing becomes bigger day by day.
As we travel on we have to wait at the gnome crossing as hundreds of them march to the battlefield, with grumpy faces and loaded guns.



My poor kids will have never a happy childhood because of these crazy tourists that come to my country to eat so called magic mushrooms or paddo’s which is short for paddestoel
(Gnomes house)


I just thought what was wrong with smoking grass or drinking beer? As the people that use it got some awesome hallucinations it became all of a sudden popular.
I always learned that hallucinations are images that don’t really excist.



But that must be difficult for our new generation as they believe in a virtual world, they are fully brainwashed and don’t have a clue about service anymore.
They google,skype,date and od everything possible on the computer, but if it comes to normal
conversation most of them don’t know how to deal with it.
They walk around totally out of the planet, not knowing who they are and were they are.
I would say in this case stop eating these mushrooms as they are not that healthy for your brain and all the stories about gnomes will be only stories and myths.



So there is not much left to tell your kids when you grow up finally. I think it is as big as the greenhouse effect and it is also bad for the finacial market. Wall street is collapsing due to this, because leprechauns (close family to the gnomes) put a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.



No wonder that it goes bad with the economy as there is hardly any manpower left to place these pots of gold at the end of the rainbows.
Also rainbows are not that often there anymore due to the global warming. The weather has really changed as it was miserable this morning and nearly summers this afternoon. I hope that this world will stop with acting stupid and our new generation finds out it is time to just work hard and will stop using these crazy drugs.
Then the future can continue again where it stopped, who will be the next victim? Santa Claus? Oh my god it is worse then I thought. Were will this end, wake up for crying out loud.



I feel sorry for these little creatures it is heartbreaking to see the little women cry about their fallen loved ones. Carrieng the dead bodies of their sons and husband, and this all because of people eating their houses. Come on human beings think before you have fun as old fashioned stuff might be not that good but it does not harm that much.


(Maybe I should stop drinking now for a little while, as I have the feeling that I get carried away a bit.) But yes I have to be there for my kids tomorrow as normal as possible anyway I will end like always with:”Live life as long it is there, pray for less fights, spend your last money on a drink and fuck if your life is depending on it.”

The Old Sailor,

What is the meaning of life?

Dear Bloggers,

This very deep questions were hitting me, it just came over me: "What is the meaning of our lives" and "Why are we here?"
I started thinking about these questions, when we had to practise a terror act drill.
It is still kind of strange to me that these people feel that they are the chosen ones, who is telling them this kind of crap?
You must be pretty crazy or brainwashed to blow yourself up.
At least you must have a pretty miserable live, with nothing in it
Every person needs to believe in to something in life



That they are really excist and handle like this in the name of a higher power.
It is strange that they believe on the other hand that everything was made by him,
and also that they are promised to go to heaven, hmm I always have been wandering if rapists and murders go to heaven?

I admit that every person has in life some challenges crossing their path.
But I must say: some are getting more challenges than the other, what is in my opinion also strange.
As everyone should be equal.
I just see it like this, we are in a way all the same from what culture are religion that does not matter.
Because at the day that we are born we all appeared butt naked on this planet and we all had to learn how to walk, how to talk.
And even though we are not all getting old and we die in a thousand different ways.
There will always be a few that mis you and remember you.
As we have gathered a lot of stuff, to make our life less miserable.
There is actually really nothing that we can take with us.



My final thought of it is:" We are coming with nothing and we are leaving with nothing."
So where is it all good for?
You can work hard, you can live your life with your heart filled with love and we are all hoping for better times.
Let us hope that someone out there is loving you with all her heart.
And that you never have to doubt or worry about the on you are depending on.



But if the time comes, that you are sailing to your final destination.
If you drop your anchor and your engine stops, you are there in silent harbour, waiting rusty until your time has past.
Ask yourself the question: "Was your life worth it?
If the answer is no it is never to late to go and get a live.

I am not forcing anyone, but I will stick these very basic things in live:
“Live life as long it is there, pray for less fights, spend your last money on a drink and fuck if your life is depending on it.”
A brighter light might be on the horizon, also for you.

The Old Sailor,

Home Sweet Home or Homesick?

Dear Bloggers,

It sounds strange but it can even happen to me.
Yes, even somebody like me, can get homesick somehow.
A couple of weeks ago , we were driving around a bit by car and all of a sudden, It struck me like lightning.
My mind was drifting of and was playing with me, when we had stopped at the lakeside and I stared across the water.



I saw the boats sail by and then I just realized that I was homesick.
I finally missed after all these years, the place were I was raised.
In a small village next to the lake.
I never experienced these feelings before, It took my breath away.
And the funny thing is that I could not talk about it for days.
I had to find out, why I had these feelings.
After a couple of days I talked about it to my wife.
It is not that I miss the village that much that I have to go back there.
But it is the water, the smell of the fresh breeze and the mentallity of the people living there.
It is a big difference to what I am used to now.
I simply have to admit that I miss the fresh air, the summer breeze which is nearly always there and simple things like going by bike with my kids to the beach.
Also that you wake up early morning and take the bike and cycle across the lake, when everybody else is still asleep. The other early people you greet when you pass them but not disturbing anything.



Enjoying every minute being in the middle of nature and together with your loved ones.
Concluding after my wife has been calculating, we have to stay at least eight years in the place were we are living now.
Before we can move back again to the area where I learned all the basic things of life and nature around me.
Unless we win the jackpot in the lotterie, or get money in an other way.
So I keep gambling on the future.
I believe that God can do miracles.
and I hope that a miracle will come my way.

Don't worry dear bloggers, I will not let my head hang down and run around fully depressed.
I still have my own believes.
Well I stick to this phrase like always: “Live life as long it is there, pray for less fights, spend your last money on a drink and fuck if your life is depending on it.”

The Old Sailor,