Showing posts with label PTSD. Show all posts
Showing posts with label PTSD. Show all posts

April 1, 2017

Inner Peace and a way to share it that is what I do and what are you looking for?

Dear Bloggers,
I travel forty minutes by car to the area of woods where I plan to hike. I drive up to a hill and park next to a couple that is taking their dogs for a walk. The hill that I am climbing is an old overgrown garbage dump. I open my door and step outside to a green grassy world. I take the dogs out of the trunk. The sun is shining overhead surrounded by a bright clear Dutch blue sky. I instantly feel more at peace. I head to the opening in the woods, and begin looking around, noticing the beauty of nature which is awaking slowly from the winter sleep.  I breathe in the clean air deeply, wanting to take it all in.

The head of the trail is lined with flowers; yellow daffodils, and crocuses in  purple, and white. The trees are of all sizes, and as I walk further down the path, the trees start getting bigger, taller, wider. When I walked here last summer it was becoming darker here. When I begin walking deeper into the woods, I’ll see just a few streams of light shining through the tree tops which are getting green.  The wind is gently blowing, creating shadows of the tree tops and leaves as they dance on the rhythm of spring.

I continue walking further and deeper into the woods and up the hill we go.  I notice a large dark grey concrete kind of staircase up ahead. As I get closer I see a rich green moss covering one side, a man made waterfall is near, I can hear the water trickling over the small steps. I keep walking, and with just a few steps I can see the water from the spring as it moves across my path. I step over it’s only a few steps wide but the stepping stones are wet, and I look at the beauty of nature as our dogs are running around like nuts.
The path begins to climb in elevation… My sense of peace deepens as I continue going to the top into an open field. I keep walking. I keep climbing in elevation. The path curves to the left and then back to the right. I keep moving forward, in my own speed I’ll find my way up the hill.  I love that it’s a total different level and again beautiful and it’s sunny up here. I walk closer to the edge of the other side. Here I’m looking at the city in the distance. I look down below on the other side and see a canal  gracefully winding through the base of the landscape, and when I look up to the sky, overwhelmingly, I feel a grateful energy called live. I breathe it all in.

On the next few months I will be coming back to this hill as often as I can to cultivate the peace within me. It was shortly after I began driving busses that our life began to change in a big way. My wife was loosing everything that she had, but I didn’t know it yet that her brain snapped and she stopped functioning as a wife and mother and slowly she was falling to bits and peace’s. 

I had to go on unemployment benefits due to Dutch regulations I had to be laid off for half a year, it was not really working in our favor. I dove deeper into myself practicing Tai Chi again using channels like You tube and remembering it from my past, and surprisingly I found even deeper moments of peace. Once I realized how simple it actually all really is, it made me a little angry at myself for all the years I wasted living an incomplete life.

When you find something that gives you that gift, after all of the years of searching for  a better you and your only suffering, you want to share it out to the world. You want everyone to feel the peace within. I’ve been looking for ways to share it with others ever since. Because once you find something so good, so wonderful, you feel as if you have to share it out to the world. Unfortunately not everyone understands what you are telling them.

As I continued my journey in life, I began noticing more, and having more awareness of habits and patterns. For instance, I would of never been able to have this realization and be on the path to living my life, if I didn’t lose everything I loved.  If you lost people that you have loved with every inch of your being, Yes I know it sounds a little airy-fairy or even a bit insane.

Anyway time continued on, I took a lot more training to keep contact with myself and the world around me, taught a lot more  things to our dogs. Sharing the peace that i found within. Creating the habit of practicing at the beginning of the day and hoping for a sensational sunrise. Since I had to spend my time during the  morning I started taking long walks, I decided to go hiking towards the sunrise every Thursday morning to stay in balance and practice. And it is so beautiful and also inspiring that I again felt like I needed to share this. Somehow I feel better than ever before.

The Old Sailor,

October 4, 2016

Trying hard to win the war within yourself

Dear Bloggers,

My wife is going through some traumatic times as she is emotional abused for almost three years in a row by two psychopathic and narcissistic persons (managers) that did everything to bring employees down that didn't fit into their profile. The company gives them a lot of freedom and it is a very sick atmosphere. A lot of former employees signed for their resignation and got a few months pay so they agreed to keep their mouth shut. My wife wasn't in the flow for leaving the company as she enjoyed what she was doing and this was against all the expectations of her manager. He was not amused with the fact that she was putting up so much resistance to keep her job. 


She kept up the fight for three years and dragged herself to work everyday. I pulled the plug in February of 2014 and she was tired and mentally so beaten up. In the last two years we have been trying to get her back on her feet with psychological help and psychiatric assistance. She has been checked on a medical scale by a neurologist and she was tested on defects by a neuro psychologist, lucky enough that there is no damage found in the brain. She is diagnosed with Complex PTSD with a panic and a anxiety disorder. Our wonderful future has been destroyed by two bastards that should be held responsible. 
 
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, PTSD, is mostly associated with soldiers returning from war. After the horrors witnessed in such an unnatural setting, many wo/men have a difficult time returning to “normal” life, often suffering from flashbacks, panic attacks, and severe anxiety.

Contrary to popular misconceptions, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and Acute Stress Disorder (or Reaction) are not typical responses to prolonged abuse. They are the outcomes of sudden exposure to severe or extreme stressors (stressful events). Yet, some victims whose life or body have been directly and unequivocally threatened by an abuser react by developing these syndromes. PTSD is, therefore, typically associated with the aftermath of physical and sexual abuse in both children and adults.
Any traumatic event can trigger it. Rape, assault, acts of physical or verbal violence, even repeated emotional abuse or the sudden split of a significant relationship, especially if abuse was involved.

Repeated abuse has long lasting pernicious and traumatic effects such as panic attacks, hyper vigilance, sleep disturbances, flashbacks (intrusive memories), suicidal ideation, and psychosomatic symptoms. The victims experience shame, depression, anxiety, embarrassment, guilt, humiliation, abandonment, and an enhanced sense of vulnerability.
My wife is rather ashamed to admit that she has experienced them all. These last few weeks have made me realize just how deep the managers have traumatized me, she said. It was my husband who noticed, actually. He said that I was exhibiting symptoms of PTSD, and he was right. How embarrassing to be experiencing PTSD because of such a short-lived work-relationship. But all of a sudden there it is.

However, this reaction doesn’t reflect her or her ability to cope with it, as much as it speaks to the depth of the abuse. The depth of the trauma caused by emotional, cruel verbal, and even narcissistic pressure abuse, not to mention the sudden change in her personality and subsequent abandonment.


The first phase of PTSD involves incapacitating and overwhelming fear. The victim feels like she has been thrust into a nightmare or a horror movie. She is rendered helpless by her own terror. She keeps re-living the experiences through recurrent and intrusive visual and auditory hallucinations (“flashbacks”) or dreams. In some flashbacks, the victim completely lapses into a dissociative state and physically re-enacts the event while being thoroughly oblivious to her whereabouts.
In an attempt to suppress this constant playback and the attendant exaggerated startle response, the victim tries to avoid all stimuli associated, however indirectly, with the traumatic event. Many develop full-scale phobias (agoraphobia, claustrophobia, fear of heights, aversion to specific animals, objects, modes of transportation, neighbourhoods, buildings, occupations, weather, and so on). My wife has somethings the other way round for example she has no more fear of heights and isn't afraid of spiders anymore. Strange how the brain works
Her fear has been so great, that an email from him throws me into a panic attack, knowing that it just contains more pain. She doesn’t read them when they come in. In fact, she does not longer know if they are coming in or not, thanks to email filters that just delete them before we will even see them.
Thank goodness for technology.


Emotional abuse, like gaslighting as well as so many other insidious forms, is hard to recognize and even harder to prove. Let me first of all explain the gaslighting effect: “Gaslighting is an insidious form of emotional abuse and manipulation that is difficult to recognize and even harder to break free from. That’s because it plays into one of our worst fears – of being abandoned – and many of our deepest needs: to be understood, appreciated, and loved. The abuser is usually a very insecure person. He has a need to put others down in an attempt to make himself feel better. He must be seen as right at all times.” Often, the only indication that your partner is causing emotional damage is to trust yourself and how you feel.
  • Are you asking yourself if you’re crazy?
  • Are you questioning reality?
  • Do you feel blamed for everything in the relationship?
  • Do you feel unsafe to talk with your partner about anything? 

     
Certainly not all charming people are predators or abusive, but it is something of which to take note, especially if they are particularly charming. Please, please look closer, or perhaps, take a step back and look at the bigger picture. Find out about their past relationships. How many? How did they end? Do they take responsibility for their actions? Their words? Are they relatively consistent in their words/actions?
indication: They don’t take responsibility for their own actions.
Please believe me when I say that these actions are insidious. I mean it. They are so subtle and often covered up by grand gestures of love and excessive affection. It is very intoxicating and convincing, but beneath it all there might be a constant assault on your sense of self through gaslighting and other forms of covert abuse.


The first step is recognizing abuse as abuse. One very surprising thing I learned about this over the past few weeks is that some types of emotional abuse feel like love. Another reason the trauma is so deep: it’s not just the damage , but it is unhealed damage from a lifetime of emotional abuse.

Research PTSD and Emotional Abuse. If you are exhibiting any of the signs, you might be trapped in a betrayal or trauma bond with the abuser. This makes it even harder to get away and heal.

Let us all learn how to protect ourselves from such people, for in this society, there is no other recourse. No way to prove it. No way to make them accountable for the damage they cause. Our only hope of defense against this type of abuse is to recognize the danger early, reinforce our armor, and get away before a trauma bond can be created. Slowly we start with counseling. To me it’s an interesting one, and it might be helpful to you, reading this blog, as it shows how one is in so much denial at first because of the shock and disbelieve, and how, if you commit to healing, you can uncover some pretty horrific things and extensive PTSD.


My wife quotes: “I might never be working again and damaged for life. Still, I’d rather know, accept, and heal than to fall into the same trap with another predator”.
Let's hope the future brings better times.



The Old Sailor,

January 30, 2016

PTSD is often a life sentence

Dear Bloggers,

PTSD is often a life sentence
Where are the therapies, the support, the compassion for those dealing with trauma?

Victims suffering from post traumatic stress injuries are not only members of the police or armed forces. Victims can be anyone; man, woman or child. Most of them struggle every day with their trauma. Many women who have suffered rape and other forms of abuse, suffer further from treatment from the courts. Interestingly, they are said to have post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) while soldiers are said to have post traumatic stress injuries. 


Post traumatic stress disorder is a wrong name. It is an injury. Disorder suggests the victim is somehow responsible for not functioning normally. PTSD victims are frightened and powerless but not responsible for their injuries. Many (sexual) assault victims suffer from PTSD and seemingly insignificant incidents can trigger panic attacks and create difficulty in functioning. When someone with PTSD commits suicide it is because they can no longer cope with their injuries. Unable to receive satisfactory treatment they take the only way they see out of their suffering.


We like to make others believe that we treat everyone the same. We don't. In my own surroundings I did a bit of survey about 49 per cent said they would socialize with a person who they would call in their normal life a friend with a mental health issue. Only question is did all the respondents gave honest answers? About 51 per cent of people around us would avoid “friends” with PTSD.


Trying to have a normal loving relationship with any man is nearly impossible. Innocent of any wrong, they suffer for the rest of their lives. And even you have been together for many years they simply cannot trust you fully anymore.
People cannot gauge the victim's suffering. Even some doctors have difficulty dealing with patients with PTSD and only offer prescription drugs as a cure. Instead of being supportive, we compound their injuries.


Talking about the trauma may be an attempt by victims to heal, to be accepted back into society. They turn to friends and family for help, but all too often the emotional impact of the trauma isn't understood and victims retreat into their shell for self protection.

A simple incident, a voice, a word, a car, anything, can bring on flashbacks and trigger the victim into a panic. Days and nights are filled with nightmares, lack of sleep, sweats, and rage. The stigma attached to victims often prevents many from seeking help until it is too late and there is little or no chance of recovery.


Most serious is the risk of suicide. When every waking moment is spent feeling rejected and alone, in fear and exaggerated alertness, ready to run in an instant, thoughts turn to suicide as the only way to find peace. This is most of the times in the first phase of the traumatized person.
Unable to work, some eventually receive some social assistance, but it's seldom enough for them to live comfortably. Reduced to below-poverty existence and forgotten, these once-productive citizens become a troubled group in society.

Recently, EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) a relatively new treatment has shown some promise. But where does a victim get this help? Only a few specialized psychologists and a couple of psychiatrists are registered with EMDR


Many victims, are losing their job and after two years of sick pay they will get unemployed and they are struggling to live on disability allowance. Instead of having a social life, they continue suffering, unable to contribute in any positive way to their own care, they depend on the care of their children or their families.


Where is the equal treatment for PTSD victims? Lucky us our insurance gives us kind of free health care? We cry out against human rights abuses in other countries but deprive our victims of their right to proper health care, to a life without fear, to security of their person? It's time we helped these innocent victims instead of adding to their abuse.
Traumatic life-threatening events often leave emotional scars, which, like physical scars, remain with an individual for the rest of their lives


I’m so tired of having PTSD…in fact I am so tired of forgetting for a moment that I have it only to have it come back and smack me in the face. That is what my wife tells me after a period of making a step back. I hate acknowledging it’s presence because then I have to accept that it is never going away and that's though as a spouse.

No matter how hard she tries, no matter how much work she does, PTSD will always be there. On some level I know it is about managing symptoms but tonight is a not to good one and I just wish it would go away.


She complained the other day to her therapist: I am so afraid of silly things and I am jumping at the slightest touch from my partner. I am not sleeping during the night and I am walking around the house. Either way if I sleep or walkabout, I wake up exhausted. I’m eating everything in sight that contains sugar and I am quickly rebuilding that wall that exists between me and the rest of the world. I want to return to old ways of coping…anything to feel comfortable in my skin. My partner is very patient but I am tired of him needing to be. I am tired of working so hard to do the right thing to only end up needing his help and support.


Luckily the racing thoughts are not back as full force as they once were and I am still able to outrun them by a bit. I am tired of living each day wondering is today the day I wont be able to manage the symptoms. Is today the day I have the meltdown that let’s the whole world know about my struggles with PTSD?

She does sometimes get to a point where life is good and she feels strong and in control of her symptoms. Today is not one of those days. I do understand that the PTSD is the result of managers abuse that I endured for 3 years. I also understand that the psychological abuse was not my fault. And in this case I could not see what was happening and even though I advised her to knock on some persons doors, none of them stopped the abuse as nobody did stop the psychological abuse he was such a “good guy” he had a free hand. What I don’t understand is why it came with a life sentence.


I think PTSD is different for everyone who experiences it. All the emotions that accompanied the original trauma were as fresh as the day you experience them. The worst part of PTSD for my wife are the nightmares, the hyper-vigilance, the adrenalin rush and the stress of always being focused on my surroundings. PTSD is, more than anything, an in-your-face realization of your own mortal nature and of the fragility of life itself. Headaches, fatigue, discomfort in places where there are large numbers of people (7-10 and up), fully hit by panic attacks, anxiety disorders, emotional numbing and inability to have close relationships can be a problem as well.

Typical phrase from my wife: "Therapy, re framing, EMDR, and a variety of techniques have worked well for me, but I admit, there are many days it is just a relief not to have to leave the house."


The Old Sailor,

December 15, 2015

How to stay in balance

Dear Bloggers,

The happiness season is on our doorstep again and this will be the second Christmas with my spouse who is suffering from PTSD. Our family is dealing with the situation and our eldest daughter is together with me the ones that give informal care. I have had a couple of comments come to me about “balance”, and a few made me realize that there is more to talk about regarding this subject.

First of all I have to add my note here…I am not a doctor of any sort or in any medical field, the information I bring to you is based on our personal experiences, opinions, and what we have learned along the way in this life journey. I am simply a spouse and a caregiver of one with PTSD, anxiety and panic attacks and other medical conditions… that brings awareness and support to others through our personal lives.


Balance is a word that I want to use a lot. Okay, more than a lot, more like all of the time, it’s extremely important to me and more than just a word, it’s a part of life. It’s a word that in reality years ago I did not even think about, and sure had no need to use that word as everything was running smoothly (so I thought), I did not realize that it was even something that existed when it came to “life”… or was needed. When I heard others use the words “balance” and “energy”, was another, I just tossed them to the side, “What? I don’t need those!” I was one of those people just like many others that just loved life, and life was something you just lived. So why would I need this thing called “balance” ? It was just another word, that back then, I myself dismissed. I was working like a mad man some days about sixteen hours and always with a smile.



After PTSD and other mental conditions became a part of our lives, I learned really fast what “unbalance” was! That foot-loose, carefree, just love and live life to it’s fullest person I was, changed! All of a sudden everything in life became serious, things happening brought an urgency, and along with that came worry, anxiety, panic, discomfort, fear, emotional hurt, and the list could keep going. That’s what I myself was experiencing, and I’m not the one with PTSD, my spouse is! None of these things were me, they hurt, and I had to find this crazy thing called balance again. Then, take all of those things my spouse did like cleaning house and paying bills, taxes and making phone calls to companies that messed up their own administration. For those who never done this kind of tasks, I can tell you it is a lot, NO, that’shoukd be overwhelmingly a lot!
It took a life experience, okay we had many experiences to the point it seemed like we were in total new period in our life and it was on the dark side of it, for me to realize and start understanding that life does indeed NEED a kind of balance. It does not matter if your life is great or your life is like hell, that term “balance” and putting it to use, can really change things.


Let me back up for a second, I used the term “hell”. I do not use or say that word very often. So if you hear it, it’s serious and here’s my view of what that means. It is the deepest, darkest, no view of a way out, You've been dropped in a black hole, you will fall in where no matter how hard you struggle it will bring you to your knees. There’s no light, there’s no hope, and that place will push you to want to give up. A place lacking balance. Okay, that’s “hell” to me, you get my point. Thank God, I am an old army guy and theres only one way even your wounded partner needs to go there and that is going forward.

I was recently told, “I’m glad you found and have a balance in your relationship, wish we had that…” I stopped what I was doing when I heard that, and I really sat back and thought about it and the way it was used in this particular sentence. I did not take it in a negative way, but the way it was said was a little misleading of a thought to what balance is for us. As well as what it takes and what comes with it.


Balance is not something that you get or find, and then it just stays there. Balance takes constant work, a lot of energy and time, effort, it takes a “give and take” when it comes to the relationship, which is difficult with someone having PTSD it is a real part of life. And there are times, many times, that balance is not present and we have to work to get it back, or some sort of back that we can manage and live with, for whatever length of time it remains.

Then there is still the fact that I am in a caregiver role, My spouse has very real life mental conditions to where I have to help as there are a lot of challenges, which means there is not and will not be an equal balance in our relationship. Again we had to find a balance that was comfortable for us, and continue working on balance itself. I had to let go of what was our balance or normal before the mental conditions. The brain and the way it functions now, does not allow for an equal balance, it’s something we continue to work on. That acceptance is what helps us have a balance. Living with mental illness is tough enough without adding to the burden of illness the pain of rejection and stigma.

At the moment there are no high expectations, or an expectation that things will be equal again, the only expectations at hand are that we can make it work together. It is a constant effort, as well as neither of us giving up on each other or giving in to PTSD. Balance is not something that comes easy, it does take hard work and effort, as well as keeping in mind that her brain does not function like it used to. Which again, is something that we continue to work on because there is always that chance it can always be better than it is today, only time holds the answer to that.

Then you have personal balance. Now, this one I have pretty much mastered, if there even is such a thing. However, I am human and at times I will lose my self balance for a moment (just like anyone else). That’s when I have to reflect on myself, who or how I truly am, whatever experiences or situations were at hand, use my coping skills, take time to think, then approach and talk about what happened… address the situation or why I became unbalanced.

I learned that pointing fingers gets you no where good, excuses are not a part of this process it’s about explaining so you can move forward together and understand each other, repair the unbalance, as well as the relationship with whomever is involved. And at times it is just simply me that lost focus, or just simply having a bad day. Accepting and admitting without dwelling on self blame or with guilt, along with everything else I did, mentioned above, when a human unbalance comes, is how I find my balance again. Again, it takes effort, work, as well as reflecting on yourself… and either person can learn to do this.

I am a firm believer that there is always something else that can be done, it may take time to find what works or to understand how, but never lose hope, there is something. We know that PTSD does not just go away, some may be able to place it in a box, but the reality is it is still there and only takes one trigger to bring it back out. Life changed, for each of us. PTSD is there for life and you only can make the best out of it. Happy holidays and enjoy what you have got, live life and think about having some balance in your life.

The Old Sailor,

September 13, 2015

When your boss is wanting to destroy you.

Dear Bloggers,

Imagine the scenario - a woman goes into work one day and her manager acts in an abusive and malicious way towards her. This is so shocking that she spends the next three years suffering from the consequences of that incident. She cannot sleep at night, she has frequent flashbacks and nightmares, she turns into a different person. The way she has been treated by her colleagues at work creates an ongoing condition that requires serious psychiatric support. If she would not have done anything but she knocked on every door that she could find to ask for help but no one reached out to stop this mentally disturbed manager who did everything in his power to destroy her mentally.
Is it right to talk about this as a complex post traumatic stress disorder (Severe PTSD)?



I compare to a dog. This dog was good and it was loyal and if something might be wrong it would bark for a while to be heard. If it looks like a dog, if it barks like a dog, and if overall it behaves like a dog, then it is most likely to be a dog. In the case of PTSD caused by bullying and abuse at work, this is a particularly black dog that has been beaten with a stick until it either shut up or it would attack and could be put down.




But most of our images of Severe PTSD come from much more 'obvious' and dramatic causes of such shock. When we think of PTSD we are most likely to think of the soldiers in Afghanistan who have suffered from exploding devices or have been subject to combat and personal loss.
In the cases of PTSD at work, then the obvious examples are of fire-fighters, on-patrol police officers, and other emergency workers who have had near death shocks in extreme circumstances. Each of these clearly are people who may be suffering from PTSD.


So is it fair to use a diagnosis of PTSD for someone whose mental health has been severely affected by bullying at work, rather than some more easily identifiable event or incident? On the other hand, let's give some thought to how a person who has been subject to workplace bullying may feel about themselves.


If we are all used to thinking of PTSD only in terms of combat veterans and violent and near death experiences, then a PTSD sufferer is also very likely to feel that their own suffering and experience is 'trivial' in comparison to the more obvious triggers of PTSD. Unfortunately, someone with PTSD is already likely to have feelings of self-worthlessness and somehow a diagnosis of their condition as PTSD may only serve to make them feel worse.
The starting point for this is to recognise the problem.


Thankfully, the issue of bullying, abuse and harassment at work has become firmly acknowledged in many respects in recent years. (Although it is shocking that it was only in 1988 that it was given the term 'workplace bullying'). The psychological harm this can cause to someone at work is recognised, but it is still rare that such harm is understood in terms of PTSD.

It is becoming recognised that PTSD can be caused by abuse in non-extreme contexts. For example, the case of my dear wife she has been mocked by her former manager that she was smelling. So after a few weeks she went to the doctors office, who could not find anything and send her to a dermatologist and there was nothing to be found. Strange thing was that i did not smell anything either and I sleep next to her every night I kept telling her it looks to me like bullying.
'Traumatic experiences or strains imposed on us by others can often hurt more than accidents.'
Indeed, the manager was replaced inside the company and my wife entered a new team in the mean time she went to a psychological centre and got treatment from great psychologist. Her new manager got the bills for it as they wanted to keep it out of sight of their headquarters and placed the bills under education bills. After being halfway the sessions she needed her manger told her that it should be enough and they would not pay for it anymore (he probably ran out of budget) My wife disagreed and called our health insurance and they picked up the bills. 


After a while the manager got the reports of the psychological centre as well. So he was informed about the case totally and started a even harder campaign on my wife to get rid of her with no extra costs. In November 2013 something snapped in her brain and she was not able to do her job anymore as a call centre agent. They gave her different job tasks in the mail room, but the bullying continued. In February 2014 I called her boss that she was too sick to come to work. He straight away told me that she should agree to sign off. I informed the Union and they told me not to panic as in the Netherlands you can be sick for 2 years and the employer must do everything to make you reintegrate into work. Either in or outsourcing.



Well you probably can guess what happened they did not see it as their problem and they believed of course their own manager.


A psychiatrist put this to me very well: It is already recognised that PTSD can be caused by experiences that are outside of the extreme shock of a life-threatening situation (such as combat or an accident). That is, there are many people suffering from PTSD due to various forms of personal abuse particularly domestic and/or sexual abuse. Such PTSD may have been caused by a single incident of abuse, or a series of events stretching over a period of time, even many years.



And so if domestic abuse or school bullying can cause a person to suffer from PTSD, it should come as no surprise then that PTSD can also be caused by abuse in the workplace. We might like to think that the workplace is a safe enough place where people behave with respect and do care, as perhaps we used to assume was the case in the home and at school. Many employers would like us to think this. But this is simply not the case. People can be nasty at work to their colleagues, just as they can be at home with their families.
For many people, the workplace is a site of bullying and abuse by their own workmates and managers, and is not a safe place at all.
If we give this some thought, most of us can probably pinpoint one or more examples of such bullying we have seen in our own careers - either done to us or others. It might not always cause PTSD, but the consequences are always nasty. 
 
The employment tribunal system has slowly begun to pick this up and use what powers it is given to redress some of the wrongs caused by employers against their workers. The most high profile of I know is the case of my wife who was subject to a nasty campaign against her by her managers and senior colleagues over a number of years. She suffered from this to such an extent that she was diagnosed with severe PTSD, and until now she is covered by the law that she can be on sick pay but this will stop in the month of April 2016. If it is up to me, she should receive compensation of €285,000 in order of lost wages, money that she could make until she could go on pension benefits in the year 2037 just towards this personal psychiatric injury, as part of a larger award amounting in total to €500,000. as all our family members suffered from the direct effects of the PTSD.



Our claim is that she is suffering from a post traumatic stress disorder and depression after being ridiculed by co-workers and managers in the call centre department of big telecom provider. My wife had had to endure a 'hostile and degrading' environment in a company which had 'lacked empathy'. It had left her in a state where she was unable to do the simplest of household chores.
In some respects, when it comes to a law suit the process will be hard and emotional and let us hope we are fortunate (if we can use this term). The system should be able to help us at this stage. It is a kind of abusive discrimination. If there had not been that element to the abusive behaviour of their managers and colleagues, it would be much harder for us to be compensated for the PTSD that her workplace has caused.


But I think most would agree that although bullying is harmful and nasty, there are many other forms of bullying and abuse that do not involve any particular forms of putting some on down and a make you feel undetermined.
It is estimated that at least one in ten people in the workplace suffer from bullying, but not all of them develop PTSD. If we can take the figures for this we should do more as employers as they are in some way indicative of the problem, then perhaps one third of these people may have some form of PTSD. This calculates as 3.3% of the working population suffering from PTSD caused by workplace bullying. With a workforce of around 7 million, that means nearly 231000 people in the Netherlands are perhaps experiencing PTSD caused by workplace bullying and abuse. That is a lot of people, and a lot of time lost from work by the people suffering the terrible consequences of PTSD (and of course it also time lost from their normal lives). It is a complete waste for everyone, apart from those who do the bullying.


It is simply the case that many people suffer the terrible experiences of PTSD due to bullying and abuse in the workplace (as can also happen or at school or at home). Although this has been happening for years, and is likely to continuing happening in future, there needs to be much more recognition of this problem and the harm it causes.


Such recognition of workplace PTSD needs to be acknowledged particularly for the sake of those with the PTSD, and also for those around them, their families, their friends, and also their employers. It is no one's interest for someone to suffer from PTSD without recognition and support.

Bastards are all over the world, maybe we should hang them.

The Old Sailor,

Talking and Writing

Dear Bloggers,   Why is it that some folks (such as myself and my daughter) talk so much? This visit, I am learning how I process throug...