Do we make our kids ready for a burn out?

Dear Bloggers,

It’s the first full weeks back to school after the start of 2013 has begun, the winter is starting to wane, Spring is slowly moving forward and the madness has begun. Along with the homework and school responsibilities comes the extra-curricular activities galore: Jazz dance, Judo, learning to play a keyboard, gymnastics, swimming, Girl Scouts, and singing with the school choir and more. If you’re a car driving dad (or even if you’re not!) chances are you’re shuttling your kids around to one or more of these activities every afternoon. But while there’s nothing wrong with clubs, sports and the like, some experts say we may be burning our kids out too young as they fall into the “busy trap” just like their folks. Are they right?

Recently a health organisation polled more than 800 boys and girls between the ages of  9 and 13. A whopping 90 percent of these kids admitted they were stressed because they were too busy. Another study found that kids’ free time has dropped by 12 percent in the past two decades, that playtime is down three hours a week, and that unstructured outdoor activities like hiking are down 50 percent. With kids being whisked from one activity to the next every day, experts say many of them have little time for homework, a healthy dinner or even a good nights’ sleep. Hmmm.....is it me or are we becoming bad parents?

I believe that this generation’s kids have become too busy with organized activities to enjoy the simple pleasures of life. When we were growing up and we were kicked outside to play, we went from house to house ringing doorbells and going too local sports clubs on a bicycle. Now kids are being driven from activity to activity and the kids next door aren’t around to play because they’re off at gymnastics or starting soccer leagues.”

Is this “busy trap” just a Dutch thing? No it is much wider an more complicated, according to me. “I think it’s good to be involved in activities, but I think it’s really important to get the balance right. Children like their own company. They lose the capability to amuse themselves if everything is put in front of them in an organized, structured club type of way. Long gone, it seems, are those times when a whole weekend ahead with nothing planned was seen as a luxury and a perfect opportunity to spend time together and share those valuable and irreplaceable moments of childhood. Parents used to go to the local pool and teach their children how to swim. ... Now they enroll them in a club where someone else teaches them.” Yes, guilty we did the same.

As a father of two, I know the “busy trap” all too well. I believe part of the reason we keep our kids so busy today is because there are simply so many choices. As my friend pointed out, back in the day, we signed up for whatever cheap recreational program was offered in our little village and called it good. There were no fancy club teams or gymnastics club or dancing studios promising Olympic gold medals if participants worked hard enough. My brother played a little soccer, and I took horse back riding lessons and later on I took fitness classes. That was it. In our (ample!) spare time, we waded in a drainage ditch behind our backyard and came home happy and covered in mud.

But I understand “those days” are long gone. Because the world is not as safe as we’d like it to be, we can’t let our children simply roam the neighborhood until it gets dark. And because many of us live in what I like to call the concrete jungle, we don’t have backyards with trees to climb and dirt to rub our feet in. This leaves children often stuck inside, left to play video games or watch too much TV.

But experts say this “busy trap” goes beyond just wanting our kids to succeed. Some argue that parents live vicariously through their children. If their son or daughter is involved in six different sports, they are important and successful, along with their children. Others say we simply don’t want to be left out. If we discover our friends’ kids have signed up for hockey, we might just find a way to squeeze it in between soccer practices, just so our child doesn’t miss out on gaining yet another skill. Is this unhealthy behavior?

Not always, extra-curricular activities can help our kids gain self esteem, help them set goals, and encourage teamwork, time management, physical development and relationships. These are all life skills kids can take with them into the workplace and beyond someday. Nevertheless, i would say, kids should stick to something they truly enjoy and feel good about.

As for me, I choose to keep it simple: Both of my kids jazz dance, making me a bonafide jazz dance dad. I have made the choice for our family to stick with our local club for now. There will always be a time for more, but I want my kids to have time to ride their bikes around the block, play at the park and maybe sneak in an ice cream cone after dinner.

Moms and dads what do you think? How many activities are too many? Have we made our kids too busy these days, depriving them of them of a relaxed childhood? Or do you think it’s healthy to keep our kids on the go? What do you think?

The Old Sailor,

Bus kills young woman cyclist

Dear Bloggers,

It may be a horrible coincidence but the situation with the Bus Companies around the North of the Netherlands has been a mess for many months now - "an accident waiting to happen" as one of the news sites flashed yesterday - and on Wednesday a 12-year-old girl on her bicycle was crushed by a bus and died of her injuries, her friend also got hit and was rushed to the hospital.

This was the headline on one of the news sites that I follow when I hear or read something about an accident, this one happened on on of the routes that we drive as well. The major roads are crossing here on a T-junction and the surrounding area has no narrowed corners so it is easy to overlook the road in all directions the road is divided at the junction in two single lanes where buses, taxis, cars are all jostling for, at best, snail's pace progress and tempers get frayed. Cyclists and pedestrians have their own lanes but need to cross this busy road. Somehow this crossing is dangerous as during rush hour it is hard to cross the road. And if it is raining you want to get home if you are on a push bike. Question to me still is: “How could they have missed eachother.”  I think over what has happened this really is drives me crazy. She must have taken a huge risk or the driver has been either blind or driving too fast. Whatever will be the outcome of this accident several peoples lives have been destroyed Wednesday.

Our own correspondent the Old Sailor had a discussion with some collegues about cyclists in the city. About how many times it ends up in a near hit and why do people underestimate the risks by just hoping that the motorised driver will hit the brakes. That was only telling us, ironically on Wednesday, what a nightmare cycling youngsters on the streets of Groningen can be, it is a hazardous environment with busses, trucks cars,mopeds and taxis. Knowing the risks and the dangerous corners I rented a push bike and cruised through the heart of Groningen to find out why people overestimate themselves. In this case I have first hand experience from a recent trip through the capital on a push bike.

The police says, "Individual fatalities are very distressing but it is not possible to see any trend with such a small number. Casualty stats never make sense in a single accident (but) is this not a total different issue. Even before (this cyclist) was killed there were complaints from all sides about the safety of cyclist and pedestrians in the city. The media has been very quick to say all the blame should be put on the driver. Accussing him of speeding and he probably overlooked the girls. (It looks like it is the other way around that the girls have missed the bus in this case.

They are “bad” news in my opinion eventhough all the good things they are publishing, but there seems to have been a failure of organisation between the different arms in this horrible drama." As they all want to be the first one with the breaking news whitout checking the facts.

A spokesperson on the local news said, “We were very saddened to hear that a young cyclist died following a collision with an on route bus on this street on 25 April. Our thoughts and sympathies are with her family and friends at this time. We will work with the police and the bus operating company, to fully investigate the incident.

She continued, “Accidents such as this one on Wednesday are rare. In the past four years, three cyclists have been killed following a collision with a bus on Groningen’s roads, despite the fact that around half a million cycle journeys and a million bus journeys are made on these roads every year. Nevertheless, we take every such accident very seriously and work with the bus operating companies to ensure bus drivers are trained in how to share road space with cyclists.”

The spokesperson concludes, "Since 2000, there has been a 21% fall in the number of cyclists killed or seriously injured on our roads, compared to the mid to late 1990s. At the same time, there has been a 107% increase in the number of cycle journeys made on Groningen’s roads in the past decade. The safety of cyclists is a huge priority for both the Mayor and the transport companies and we are committed to making cycling as safe as possible.

Still every incident is one too many who-ever might be guilty in this case there are only losers in this case. Even when it might not the drivers fault he needs to live with the fact that you have killed someone and you have disrupted so many others lives. Live is bitch that is for sure.

The Old Sailor,

Keepng the cars from the city

Dear Bloggers,

As a bus driver I also need to drive in the city of Groningen to get students into the right directions from Central Station to the biggest student campus you have to drive straight through the city and I must say that this is not the easiest job as bicycles are passing you on all sides and you have to try not to kill any of them. The streets are pretty narrow but there are not many cars on these roads as they are only available for busses and taxis and of course bikes are allowed here as well. I must say it is quite a challenge to drive in a city that you only know from the outskirts. The city itself is famous for its one way traffic so it is easier to walk or bike if you want to go shopping. The big shopping malls for construction, gardening and furniture are on the outside of the city and have plenty of parking space.

In Groningen, the Netherlands' sixth largest city, the main form of transport is the bicycle. Sixteen years ago, ruinous traffic congestion led city planners to dig up city-centre motorways. Last year they set about creating a car-free city centre. Now Groningen, with a population of 170,000, has the highest level of bicycle usage in the West. 57% of its inhabitants travel by bicycle - compared with four per cent in the UK.

'57% of its inhabitants travel by bicycle '

The economic repercussions of the programme repay some examination. Since 1977, when a six-lane motorway intersection in the city's centre was replaced by greenery, pedestrianisation, cycleways and bus lanes, the city has staged a remarkable recovery. Rents are among the highest in the Netherlands, the outflow of population has been reversed and businesses, once in revolt against car restraint, are clamouring for more of it. As Gerrit van Werven, a senior city planner, puts it, 'This is not an environmental programme, it is an economic programme. We are boosting jobs and business. It has been proved that planning for the bicycle is cheaper than planning for the car.' Proving the point, requests now regularly arrive from shopkeepers in streets where 'cyclisation' is not yet in force to ban car traffic on their roads.

'Businesses, once in revolt against car restraint, are clamouring for more of it'

A vital threshold has been crossed. Through sheer weight of numbers, the bicycle lays down the rules, slowing down traffic, determining the attitudes of drivers. All across the city roads are being narrowed or closed to traffic, cycleways are being constructed and new houses built to which the only direct access is by cycle. Out-of-town shopping centres are banned. The aim is to force cars to take longer detours but to provide a 'fine mesh' network for cycles, giving them easy access to the city centre.

Like the Netherlands nationally, Groningen is backing bicycles because of fears about car growth. Its ten-year bicycle programme is costing £20m, but every commuter car it keeps off the road saves at least £170 a year in hidden costs such as noise, pollution, parking and health.

Cycling in Groningen is viewed as part of an integral urban renewal, planning and transport strategy. Bicycle-friendly devices seen as exceptional in the UK - separate cycle ways, advanced stop lines at traffic lights, and official sanction for cyclists to do right hand turns at red lights - are routine.

New city centre buildings must provide cycle garages. There are tens of thousands of parking spaces for bikes, either in 'guarded' parks - the central railway station has room for over 3000 - or street racks. Under the City Hall a nuclear shelter has been turned into a bike park.

"We don't want a good system for bicycles, we want a perfect system", says Mr. van Werven. "We want a system for bicycles that is like the German autobahns for cars. We don't ride bicycles because we are poor - people here are richer than in England. We ride them because it is fun, it is faster, it is convenient."

Following Groningen's van

Groningen undoubtedly leads the way in the 'cyclisation' of Europe's cities, but many others are putting two wheels in motion to follow its example. In Germany and the Netherlands in particular, where car culture and the Green movement have both made significant impacts, many cities are building on their provision for bikes. The UK, where transport policy priorities are still dominated by motor vehicles, rather lags behind Groningen's van.

No other European city can match Groningen's record, where fiftyseven per cent of all trips around the city are on bikes, but in quite a few the ratio is rising to a third or more. Delft and Munster now have 41 per cent, and Freiburg's 27 and Heidelberg's 22 per cent are only the leading examples for what is becoming a trend across the continent.

Uniting these cities is a dual commitment on the part of central and city planners to discourage cars and to encourage bikes. Amsterdam, along with 30 other Dutch cities, for instance, voted to eliminate motor vehicles from their city centres in 1992. The Norwegian cities of Oslo, Trondheim and Bergen levy a toll on all cars entering the town centre.

Matching the disincentives for car drivers are carrots for cyclists, such as Bremen's designation of certain streets as bikes-only zones, or Denmark's provision of cycle lanes on three quarters of its roads.

Such legislative commitments do seem to be the key in getting citizens to kick the car habit. Tthe cost of the 'motorised society'. Traffic jams cost about £15 billion simply in terms of delayed deliveries and time that is wasted.

New roads, the maintenance of old ones and administration cost £6 billion. Noise pollution, racks up a further £2.1 billion in lost productivity, medical care and depressed property values, and other kinds of pollution waste another £3 billion. Road accidents, in grim addition, soak up another £5 billion.

For the moment such striking statistics have failed to steer British transport policy away from its infatuation with road building as the solution to traffic congestion, and it will be some time yet before London charts on Bicyclist magazine's top five world biking cities. In 1993 this featured Tianjin, Copenhagen, Harare and Seattle. Straight in at Number One, perhaps predictably, was Groningen

The Old Sailor,