Showing posts with label facebook. Show all posts
Showing posts with label facebook. Show all posts

March 11, 2014

Before there was e-mail, Facebook or anything on the Internet



Dear Bloggers,

Due to a situation at home I did not come to writing a blog last month and I feel pretty awful about it as writing is something I normally do to get my thoughts organized. It made me think about my younger days when I still was a boy. I met the most fabulous girl at my dad’s pony stable and she straight away swept me of my feet. Due to the fact that she lived in Germany we decided to become pen pal. 


And we have been writing for many years and we became real good friends. We paid each other visits and we gave small presents Somehow I did things terribly wrong and the friendship was lost until a reconnection was there through Facebook. And I am so happy to have a little bit of contact again. Even we never had anything as in a relation she was one of the first girls in my live where I could share everything with and it developed me as a guy to do things with my heart and my mind. I am still thankful that she opened my soft side. And I am not afraid anymore to write about my feelings 


Before computers and e-mail…a lot of people actually wrote honest letters. And as in my own case sometimes from foreign countries. The newspapers had a special column for this. The Exchange Column invited readers from everywhere in the world to write a letter, expressing their interests. Generally, along with your name and address, you included your date of birth and your wedding anniversary date, the names and ages of your children, as well as your hobbies and collections.



When I began thinking about those days. I wondered – What happened to all of those Press publications? An Internet search revealed that there are still some pen pals as most of them are writing now by email and became key pals The idea of a magazine devoted primarily to pen-pals appears to have fallen by the wayside, overtaken, perhaps, by today’s computer generated email and chat rooms. (However, I was amused to discover in an Internet search on Google.com, an article written by a young woman who happened to discover an old pen pal who became a famous writer, she and some friends started up a monthly publication they call “Old Friends” which was based on their past. The author wrote, “I liked the old way sitting at home reading letters and writing back on them and I was intrigued by the way the community had different minded individuals scattered across the world who looked forward each month for new letters about what happened in their lives…” So, it seems, the memory and ideas of “The good old days” live on.



Go back with me, in time, and let me share with you how things were before email came along.
I began writing to her (My German pal she wrote in German amd I wrote in Dutch) in the mid-1980s. Specifically, I think I “discovered” myself in the summertime of 1986. I think I began finding the writer in me, as my letters were still not the best ones if it comes to grammar but I wrote to her in an honest way not knowing what to do with my feelings. So I did a lot of silly things in life to find about myself. Around that same time, I became interested in collecting and reading books. Simultaneously, a friend of mine told me about doing a cultural study at an institute and had to read a lot of classics. I that period I read classic books like Shakespeare but also lighter classics on the Second World war in Australia thanks to her I got interested in the opinion of other people that was what she was searching for.



“I bet I know where we can find it!” I told her. I wrote a letter to an Aussie friend, asking for the book Australian women at war, offering to pay cash. As an afterthought, I added that I was interested in buying/exchanging old classic books. Little did I suspect what an avalanche of mail would fill my mailbox when my letter was sent! I received over 25 books. I purchased several of the books and I began buying/trading for many other books which formed the nucleus of my book collection. And I have to tell you something that I think it was pretty spectacular. I was never “cheated” or short-changed by anyone. Even more spectacular were the friendships that I formed, as a result of that one letter, although none of them still exists to this day.



One of the first letters I received was from another book collector, a woman who lived in Brisbane. Betsy and I both young people at the time have remained pen-pals for 4 years, while we grew up, got married, and had children of our own. 

Another pen-pal acquired in the late 80s was my friend Penny (I will use Penny as a fictive name as I try not to harm any one's life.although I informed the person about this story that I wrote, if there would be any mistakes or what so ever I can correct them.) , who lives in the South of the Netherlands. I first met Penny in 1988, on my late summer vacation in Benidorm in Spain. We spent a night at Penny’s hotel room and I was sent on my way the next morning with a bagful of thoughts and a great night of special escapades during that night. What I remember most about that visit was my first reaction when I arrived home again with a feeling of being hung-over and I realized that this was just another summer love. I was so heart broken by this girl. I saw her again in the fall during the after party but there was nothing left of those feelings. 



The downside to having pen pals, if there is a downside, is that sometimes letters stop coming both of these friends had become older and had a life of their own with children or having many health issues…like me or perhaps there is nothing left to write about to their pals and to tell you what had happened to them.


Before everyone owned a computer and Internet services flooded the market we had the Local Newspapers and Popfoto a magazine for youngsters. The concept of Popfoto, at that time, was to offer bulletin boards to which you could write, asking for friends, interviews with pop artists, whatever problems you had   write them about. It was through Popfoto that I became acquainted with new people but that was soon to change. Eventually, Popfoto would be overcome by AOL, Yahoo, Juno and the dozens of other Internet services which have changed our lives so drastically. I think the one greatest thing about the Internet is that it has brought so many of our family members and friends back together again. By using Hyves, Twitter and Facebook. I find a lot of people from my past by using those media sites
Somehow the pen pals slipped slowly from my radar. But the friendships forged by these pals have remained an integral part of my life. Yours too, I hope.



And now we have the Internet…Facebook and blogs, such as this one of mine, Old Sailor 2007. But there is still much to be said for the art of writing letters, of finding letters and cards from all over the world in your mailbox. Much nicer than finding only bills and flyer's in the mailbox! And if you are someone still interested in pen pals and actual correspondence, may I suggest just talk to strangers and give it a try you never know what happens. All because of being pen pals!



For those of us who grew up with pen pals in our lives. Sometimes pen pals come into your life and stay forever while others may come and go. I am reminded of my German pen pal I had while I was living life on the wild side. She attended still in high school in Dusseldorf while I attended at jobs offered by temp’s offices. I lost contact with her after she was graduating from high school. But oh, the joy, over the years, of exchanging letters,  photographs and sometimes small gifts with a pen pal so far away email on the Internet may fill some of the void but I have to tell you, I still get a thrill finding real letters in my mailbox.



Before Email….all we had were letters – and even though I am still a fan of handwritten letters, I also became a digital writer, I have to admit computers have greatly broadened our horizons.

The Old Sailor,

September 30, 2012

Facebook invite sparks riot in Haren


Dear Bloggers,

It is just a bit more than a week ago that some of our colleagues got involved in this drama in the commuters town of Haren. A small town of 19.000 with pretty normal inhabitants. We have a couple of buslines running through and I never experienced any trouble here. Until this poor high school student placed invitation on facebook and forgot one little mark. The colleagues that have been there during the riots have feared for there lives. As these there vehicles got smashed with bricks, streettiles, sticks and for sale signs and whatever these idiots could find on there stampede. It was a complete warzone one of them told me. 




When Dutch high school student Merthe planned a small gathering with friends to mark her 16th birthday, she had no idea it would turn into a riot-filled night with thousands of sensation seekers descending on her small Dutch hometown of Haren. But one forgotten click meant her Facebook invitation went viral and now editors, journalists, police and public officials are asking who is to blame, and who is going to pick up the after-party damage tab? 


After Merthe neglected to mark her party invitation as “private,” it went viral, with some 30,000 people saying they would “attend” what became known as Project X Haren, named after an American film with a similar theme. I think it is strange that people are coming too a non excisting party to play the hooligan. There must be some wires missing in their brains. Maybe these so called thrill seekers should be sterilized as a part of their punishment.

Police estimate that some 3,000 youngsters actually made the trip last Friday night to the upscale town of 19.000 inhabitants near the northern city of Groningen, where 500 riot police were waiting for them.



“Miserable and frightening”
In a night that saw cars burned and windows smashed, the numbers aren’t pretty: some 35 arrests, 30 people reportedly treated in the hospital, and damages that insurers are estimating could be in the millions. Even the local Albert Heijn supermarket wasn’t spared.


"I went because a friend of mine said it would be fun…we understood something would be organised,” said attendee and University of Groningen student. But after staying for only half an hour, he realised nothing was organised at all and left the scene he called it: “miserable and frightening, not really a success.”
In the aftermath of the Haren affair, indeed, even in the lead-up--there’s been a lot of finger pointing about who is to blame for the out-of-control event. Many observers blame the social media sites where the party originated, not only Facebook, but the re-tweets on Twitter and even promotional videos on YouTube.


Blame the messenger
The Consumer Affairs Minister of Germany, a country that has had at least two of its own viral parties says Facebook should change its privacy settings to avoid private invitations becoming public. “What has to happen before Facebook takes action?’ asked Minister Ilse Aigne. Facebook Netherlands, meanwhile, says while it regrets the trouble in Haren, it is not responsible, and the company maintains its privacy settings are not difficult to use. In the Netherlands a lot of youngsters use Hyves a similar program like Facebook which has a pop up before you place something which asks who should be able to read this? You can choose from options like friends and everyone. I would say Facebook could put in something similar.





On the website of the Dutch media trade magazine Villamedia, editors and academics also weighed in on the debate, with media sociologist Peter Vasterman of the University of Amsterdam saying traditional media’s coverage of the event turned it into something much bigger than social media could have done alone. "Traditional media make an issue really important," said Vasterman of the constant pre-party coverage. But the chief editor of Dutch broadcaster NOS said he was just doing his job. "It's news that a girl makes a mistake on social media and then a village is in fear,” said Marcel Gelauff. “I cannot ignore that."




Haren’s mayor Rob Bats has called for an investigation into the role of both social and traditional media in the Haren affair. “What should we tolerate from the media?” he asked. Dutch Justice Minister Ivo Opstelten, meanwhile, has called the riots “completely unacceptable” and says those who caused the damage should foot the bill.

Double-edged social media
But officials investigating Friday night’s disturbances are using the same social media they blame for the unrest to help them solve it. Police are combing videos and photos from the night in an attempt to track down the troublemakers. A call for the public to upload riot images on the national police’s website has led to four gigabytes of footage so far.




In addition to other public videos of the disturbances that are being used to help identify perpetrators, authorities say they can trace potential witnesses via social media. “We constantly monitor Twitter,” said a Groningen police spokesman.

Facebook, too, is being used by officials to help identity those involved. And in perhaps an even greater irony, the website that spawned Project X Haren may also offer one of the most practical solutions to the town’s immediate problems: according to broadcaster NOS, some 15,000 people have “liked” a Facebook appeal for people to go to Haren to help clean up the mess.


If this is the world we live in, we should fear for the worst if your daughter is on the internet now! So until she has left the house try to explain to her the dark sides of internetcommunities

The Old Sailor, 

April 19, 2011

When people stop talking.....it is awfully quiet on the bus

Dear Bloggers,

As the common readers know that I am driving commuters busses from town to town in the Northern regions of the Netherlands. During one of my journeys as a bus driver it all of a sudden came to me, I looked in the mirror to overview my passengers and even this ride is more than 40 kilometres absolutely no one was talking to any of the other passengers. I really started wandering what these people were doing during this long journey. I decided to observe each passenger closely for a while. Several are having earphones in and listen to music, others are pretty busy typing messages on there smart phones. Only one young lady was reading a book and two of them were dozed off into better dreams as they had a smile on their faces. One girl in the mirror stared back at me and had a bit of a gazed look in her eyes, problem was that she was sitting half way the bus otherwise we probably had chit chatted about the things that bother us in life. To me it occured that she was kind of disappointed in her fellow travellers or maybe she wanted to talk to someone but simply did not know how to start a conversation?



Twitter is cool. Wikis are neat. Hyves is, hmmm, good? And email is email. Facebook is also pretty usefull when friends live hundreds of kilometres away from you. These tools are all useful in helping us communicate with each other when we’re separated by great distances. They help us bridge the gap by providing fast, efficient means of communication. It doesn’t get more efficient than Twitter’s 140 character limit. But take a close look at these tools. They all share a common characteristic. They’re all based on written communication. Okay facebook has a chat option but I do not use it that much. While the written word may be very efficient for transferring information, it is not very effective at persuading people or making a real impact. And there is a tremendous difference between being effeicient and being effective..


Sure, we transfer the information that something is wrong and needs to be corrected. But that’s all we do, transfer information. Emails, Tweets, Wikis, and Hyves don’t help us move others to action. Action, not information, is what moves us toward continuous improvement and success. And nothing moves people to action more than the spoken word.

The written word is the information channel and speaking is the action channel.

Speaking is like a multichannel Surround Sound experience, in which dozens of channels simultaneously feed information to the human mind. These various channels communicate a richly textured, multilayered message from speaker to listener. These channels consist of :

· Posture

· Facial expression

· Energy level

· Eye communication

· Vocal inflection

· Vocal intonation

· Volume

· Gestures and other physical actions

· And more

All of these non-verbal cues help transfer not just the information of the narrative, but the emotion and urgency of the message. They do so more effectively than any number of !!!‘s or URGENT‘s in an email can ever do. And it’s this emotion, this passion, this energy of verbal communication that motivates and persuades others to action. When you come to understand this basic premise, you then understand why communication, VERBAL communication, is essential to the success and improvement of any organization. Success and improvement require action, not just information. It requires that people in the organization are motivated to action to do the things that need to be done to improve the organization and their products.


I’ve written about the different levels of communication mediums, and I’ve also provided a solution for the human being “Simply talk to every stranger on the bus.” I know that this world has become crazy and there are many nutcases out there but if the world is getting quiet than we are losing the dialogue to the human rase. To help shy youngsters to communicate more effectively, my generation should start the conversation to keep the dialogue going and I hope it will help.


But, please don’t misunderstand me as I meet young people every day that do talk to me and thank me for the nice journey. Tools like twitter, google, e-mails, hyves, facebook and even old fashioned newspapers are good second alternatives for transferring information. But, when you need to transfer emotion and move people to action, don’t rely on these tools for communication. Remember how to talk to each other and remember that face-to-face communication is the real power behind the most successful organizations and teams. So, the next time you find a moment in your life and you think that this could be done more effective, don’t send an email to your manager about the problem. Walk into his or her office and use your verbal skills to persuade him or her that something needs to be done, now. Move him or her to action today!!!


If you want to communicate than don’t be afraid and talk to all kinds of people around you as you never know who is sitting on the other side and his or her opinion might change your mind. Eventually it might bring you closer to a solution of whatever is happening in your life. Or you might learn something completely new about an other culture or even about yourself. Don’t worry I am not a shrink or a preacher, I am just a free mind who loves to talk about all kinds of subjects that are occurring in our lives. Whatever is on your mind you can discuss with me and will try to give some decent answers.

The Old Sailor,

When Anger makes life difficult

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