I need a little help getting over being laid off...

Dear Bloggers,

I worked for the same employer for so many years, thought they were great (in some ways, still do) but was blindsided by a layoff due to health reasons. I loved my job, the customers, most of the staff, etc. It's been two weeks, and I'm just at a loss at what to do with myself to ward off the obsessing over every little thing that's gone on in my life in the last year. I keep trying to tell myself to let it go, can't change the past, etc. but it's literally what I go to bed thinking about, dream about and then get up about but still I am trying to keep busy, obviously looking for a job. I have unemployment insurance but the bloody state of Denmark is extremely slow with their payments and while things will be tight for awhile, it's not crucial that I am employed right away and I am very wary of continuing in the same field. I am so far applying for jobs that use my skills but are not anything like what I did before. I will still try to find a job working with customers.I'm interested in hearing other people's stories about what they did to ward off the laid-off demons, especially if you feel you ended up a lot better off !!

For me, the hardest part about being laid-off was not being able to control a major decision in my life. The company management makes the decision that there is going to be a lay-off, decides who will be affected, when it will be implemented, and what the terms are. The decision has the most profound effect on the employee. Getting laid off creates a ton of stress -- Will I get a new job? Will I have enough money? What about health insurance? But to top it off, it is a humiliating process.Then you have to follow up the lay-off with looking for work. Again, it is a process completely out of your control. You send resumes, emails, make calls and you may or may not get a response. The process reassures you that you are not in control of your career.

I dealt with it by countering the feeling of helplessness. I used my time off to take control of my health. I started cycling as much as possible on good days and getting into shape. I found an aspect of my life that was important to me and that I could keep in my control. At the time I had no idea that I was doing this, but when I look back now I can see that it was the most beneficial thing that I did to deal with the situation. And I don't want to set the bar too high -- I didn't turn myself into some sort of Ironman I just got some exercise, ate better, and lost some weight. But the important thing was that I was working towards something that I had decided. All that said, being laid-off was still a miserable, stressful, and lonely time in my life. I don't think it is all that unusual to be 'lost' for the first month. I know I had a hard time finding the motivation to do anything, including looking for work, during that first month. If for some reason your financial situation allows it, then let yourself take it easy for a month.

Unfortunatly my financial situation is bad at the moment and I had to give my case to an attorney to get things sorted. It is incredible how slow these things can work and that they still call it a social system. You get stressed already when you have to phone them, 48 minutes waiting time is far to long in my opinion but does not seem to be abnormal. (long distance call alhough inside Europe)
As soon as you are through you can sense the dispatchers panic as she has to speak English to me, instead of Danish but she is trying at least. Downpart of the phonecall is that my case is not investigated yet, so she can only answer a few of my questions. My case was sended to them a fortnight ago. On top of that I am battling with some sore throat problems and some flu kind of symptoms. If this is the swine flu I think I found a cure to stop it:

How we keep grip on the swine flu pandemic

As you know, the (Mexican) swine flu easily transferable via eg doorknobs, keyboards, taps, etcetera etcetera . Recent research has shown that the bacterium is very easily transmitted through the use of coins and banknotes. The bacterium attaches itself very well to the notes and coins which daily go through many hands, which is an increased risk of infection with it. To keep the swine flu outdoors, you can drop off your used coins and banknotes from now =For Free = hand them in to me. I will personally ensure that your capital will be destroyed. I will also ensure that the bacteria no chance to cause further contamination. You can either hand in your coins and banknotes with me or drop them off in the mail-box. The mail-box will be emptied and cleaned every day in order to combat infection. Spread the word ... Spread the word ... Spread the word ... of course if you live far away you can also send a cheque or ask for my bank account.

The Old Sailor,