Showing posts with label complain. Show all posts
Showing posts with label complain. Show all posts

November 21, 2012

How to make neighbor clean up his yard



Dear Bloggers,

We got our house for sale for almost three years as the market is pretty tough at the moment. So we were all excited when there were couple of potential buyers that would come and visit our house and also the house of one of our neighbors. When they saw our neighbors house they saw the mess of his neighbors who's yard is having boundaries with his property. And believe me these rental homes are bringing down our neighborhood with homes who are maximum 15 years of age. Losing money on your investment is always painful but if the home owner is just not doing anything puts me in a warrior state of mind.


When a neighbor has a messy yard, it's likely to affect you in two ways. The first is it's an eyesore and can be bothersome to look at. The second is that it can lower the value of your home as well as the neighborhood. This is particularly true if you are trying to sell a house, and a potential buyer is hesitant to live next to your messy neighbor. Many approaches can resolve this, but the ones you pick will depend largely on the relationship you have with your neighbor and your neighbor's attitude. The pictures I added our not from our neighbors as a lawsuit is still in progress and this might harm our case.

Instructions

Think the subject over, and decide approaches you can employ to get your neighbor to clean the yard. Consider if she has extenuating circumstances, such as an illness, a recently born baby or an extended period in which she was away. Remember some people are just naturally messy. Have a plan. This will help prevent you from approaching the neighbor in an overly emotional and disjointed way.

Try the carrot-over-the-stick approach first. Appeal to your neighbor's better nature, and bring up the subject of his messy yard with a smile on your face. Use a little psychology. Sometimes you can persuade people to do things without their even realizing it. Speak in a friendly and relaxed tone.


Use some commonsense arguments if the nice approach does not work. Say the mess is affecting the value of your property. This will be particularly effective if you have a for sale sign on your lawn. Bring up potential health hazards if the neighbor's yard is littered with garbage or dog poop.

Try some other approaches. Offer to help clean up the yard. Try to get other residents in the neighborhood to talk to your neighbor and join in the effort. The neighbor might be willing to listen to someone else. Offer to help pay to clean up the yard. Some cleanup services will be glad to do it for a price. Bribery might be too strong a word, but people do listen when the subject is money. If a yard is extremely messy, it's possible your neighbor is not cleaning it because it's too daunting a task. If you offer help, your neighbor might look at the job in a different way. Have your real estate agent talk to the neighbor if your house is for sale. This will really drive home the point of the value of your home.



Put your foot down by firmly telling your neighbor the situation has become intolerable. Tell your neighbor that if he does not address the mess immediately, you will go to the authorities. If that still does not work, go to your local government and make it aware of the situation. There are ordinances and zoning codes against dumping and other sanitation violations. The fact that your neighbor could be fined might finally result in some action. Contact the government again if it fails to respond to your complaint.

Be smarter than your neighbor. If the subject of the yard turns into a debate, use indisputable logic.

Don't get in a fight or threaten your neighbor with physical violence. This will only make the situation worse and almost certainly will not result in a clean yard.

How to Report the Negligence of Property Owners

Negligent property owners can drag down your home's value.
Many people have had to deal with messy neighbors and property owners. A neglected property can be an invitation for vermin, crime, and other sanitation issues. On top of it all, an unkempt property in your neighborhood or on your street can drag down the value of your home. With all the properties on the market today, why would someone want to deal with messy neighbors when they could get a house in a neighborhood without the eyesores. Luckily, there are ways to get negligent property owners to own up to their responsibilities. 



Instructions

Start with a direct approach. There isn't always a need to get authorities involved, as you may be able to handle the problem directly with the property owner. If the owner is living on the property, you can approach the owner and voice your concerns in a calm manner. If the owner does not live on the property, try your best to make contact with the person over the phone about the issue. Many times, this is all it will take to have the problem fixed.

Ensure that the person really is the property owner. If the person on the property is actually just a tenant, you have another step before going to authorities. Find out who is renting out the property and contact that person. You can do this through your county's property tax assessor's office. Once you have this information, send a letter to the landlord, including pictures of the negligence for added effect.

Complain to the lender of the property if it is in a foreclosed state. Do not settle for a customer service representative on this one. Make sure you speak with management, and go all the way up to the chief executive officer if that is what it takes. If this isn't giving you fast enough results, go to your state's governmental website and find the police officer who is in charge of your neighborhood.

Enlist help if necessary. If you are in a homeowners association, contact the group and submit a formal request for it to take action. If at this point you are unable to get satisfaction, contact your local village association. Find the number for your local public health department and call the office to explain what is going on. Make sure to take note of all sanitation and safety issues involving the property.

Contact a lawyer if you want to take this even further. A real estate attorney would be best for this. You may be able to sue the homeowners association if it didn't resolve the issue, or the owner of the property. Remember that these cases can drag on and be expensive, so this step should only be used as a last resort.


We are nearly at the last step the neighbor received a court order. Let us hope there will be soon some new response of potential buyers.

The Old Sailor,

February 1, 2009

How good are you in your relationship?

Dear Bloggers,

In our youth we had a different picture of psychologists, they were pushed into the corner of the alternative healers, these things have changed quite a bit in todays world.
Therapy is not dangerous or irrelevant anymore, although a lot of people are afraid of being in therapy.
(They still think that you need to be crazy or that you have to calm things down with real pills from a 'real' doctor)
In this crazy world, which is always on the run and stresses people out.

Psychologists deal in the way the mind works and motivation, and can specialise in various areas such as; mental health work and educational and occupational psychology.

What is psychology?
Psychology is a science based profession.
It is the study of people: how they think, how they act, react and interact.
It is concerned with all aspects of behaviour and the thoughts, feelings and motivation underlying such behaviour.
They look at how the ideas and theories involved in each area have developed, and explore some psychological questions of their own by undertaking practical research.

Now read here the following item, why I think that sometimes a relationship with a partner does not work.
Unfortunatly we are human beings and we become either selfish or slave.
We are a strange kind of species, or at least that is what I am thinking.

Some couples look like they really have it together until the day they shock even their best friends with the announcement that they’re getting divorced.
Other couples, in contrast, frequently bicker and find fault.
Yet, the next day they wake up relaxed, smiling, and appreciative of one another.
Clearly, the health of a relationship is not always evident to outsiders.
Moreover, it may not even be evident to those who are living it.
Sometimes you don’t know if your own relationship is in jeopardy or if it has simply hit a few bumps in the road.



Of course, time will tell ….nothing stays the same.
Things either get better or they get worse.
But wouldn’t it be helpful if you could assess the symptoms, like people do with medical problems.
That way you can either reassure yourself that what you are experiencing is no big deal or that it’s good you’re seeking help before things get out of hand or that indeed, these are critical and serious symptoms that will have major consequences without immediate treatment.

If you are now reflecting on the health of your own relationship, you should know about five danger signs that indicate big time trouble.

Let me summarize them.

1. Interpreting your man’s “bad behavior” as an irreversible character flaw.
It’s not just what your man does (or doesn’t do) that creates problems, it’s also how you interpret his behavior.
For instance, if he was supposed to pick up something on the way home from work and he didn’t do it, do you think of him as “a selfish man who doesn’t give a damn about anybody except himself” or as “a guy who is forgetful and easily distracted.”
The more negative your interpretation is, the more damning it is to his entire character, the more you view it as fixed versus temporary (being tired or inattentive), the more your relationship is in jeopardy.



2. Frequent use of cross-complaining.
Cross-complaining is when one person complains and the spouse, rather than addressing the complaint, makes a counter complaint.
Picture how you would feel if you told your husband, ”What a difficult day I had” and she responded, “You think your day was tough, you should have seen what I went through.”
Cross-complaining invariably leads to a feeling of alienation, often expressed as,”I can’t talk to you”, or “You’re just not interested in what I have to say”.
Much better to listen and respond to whatever is brought up first; then put your own issue on the table.



3. Treating your man with contempt.
Obviously, you cannot hope for a healthy relationship if you are chewing up your man and spitting him out for breakfast.
However, when contempt is less malevolent, it may skip by you without awareness.

Beware of disdain that takes the form of:

1. Rolling your eyes as your spouse speaks;
2. Assuming a patronizing, lecturing tone of voice;
3. Responding with gestures of disgust;
4. Making nonnegotiable announcements which cut off all input;
5. Using disrespectful language including name-calling and cursing.

b. A circular response of criticism and defensiveness.

Typical pattern: She is upset with him. He responds defensively, justifying why he’s right or giving her a “yes, but” response.
She doesn’t think he gets it.
She becomes more critical, more angry.
He becomes more defensive, more distant.
As this pattern escalates, she “nags” more, he “stonewalls” more.
She feels, “it’s useless to even talk to him”; he feels “she’s always right, why even bother to respond”.
The end result: Frustration at the highest level.
Not good for the relationship.
Not good for each individual’s self-esteem.



c. Not enough good times to balance out the bad ones.
We’ve all been told that “you need to take the good with the bad”.
But this is easier said than done.
For it’s not enough to have a one-to-one ratio between good and bad times. Unfortunately, the negative tends to linger longer in memory and take a long time to heal.
Hence, count on needing at least five good experiences to counterbalance one bad one.
And if the bad one is particularly hurtful, expect that only time and a sincere effort to rebuild trust will make a difference.
So there it is.
If you recognize any of these symptoms in your relationship, don’t waste any more time in addressing the issues.
Wouldn’t it be great if thinking of your husband brings a smile to your face instead of a sigh?
I hope that you don’t give up on a relationship that still has the potential for healing and growth.



Why are we sometimes so impossible towards eachother, why don't we make love and be happy with what we have. Look around there are enough negative people on this planet.

”Live life as long it is there, pray for less fights, spend your last money on a drink and fuck if your life is depending on it.”

The Old Sailor,

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